When we were trying to come up with a name it was you who picked it. I wanted to name you Kodak but you didn't respond to that and Mommy didn't like it. While we were going through Lord of the Rings names you perked up and came to us when we said "Pippin." From that moment on you always knew your name.
You always kept a lookout for danger out the back door, and no matter how fearsome the possum, raccoon, or other cat was you would poof up your tail and make the most God-awful howling noises and scare them away. You protected your girls. So much so that when we added another boy cat to our little family you were pissed. You never accepted Stinky, and that's ok. He's a sweet kitty, but he's too much of a pussycat to replace you as Defender of the House.
When you got sick we tried to do everything to make you better. I'm so sorry that we couldn't. We understood that the heart disease meant that you might not have much time left, and that we would have to struggle with you twice a day to take your medicine. We were just happy that we got to spend more time with you. When it struck again so soon, back in the hospital only 2 weeks after the first episode we feared the worst. Now they told us your kidneys were also failing, and there was no hope. Your Mommy and I were faced with an awful decision and we cried and cried.
On Friday the emergency vet was able to make you comfortable and send you home. With slightly modified medication they said you might get another week. We had an appointment set for Saturday morning to help you end your suffering, but I was selfish. I still had a glimmer of hope in my heart- maybe the vet was wrong... maybe you would show them all and make an astounding recovery! I called the vet and cancelled your deadly appointment. But I now understand how selfish that was. I wanted more time with you, but I wanted it for me. I couldn't face the finality of taking you to that last vet visit. I spent the weekend taking pictures and videos of you, such a handsome kitty! I recorded the sound of your purrs, still as loud as ever, even through these awful illnesses.
Thank you for these last few days, and enduring your illnesses long enough for us to say goodbye. Please forgive me my selfishness in keeping you around perhaps a bit too long. It's because I love you so much. It's that love which also finally made me realize that our greatest responsibility as your humans was to make that decision to let you go peacefully. Goodbye Mister Pipster, we are going to miss you so much!
1 comment:
What a lovely tribute. I still miss my Dali...
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